quotes
by Frankie pants
Summary: My favorite qoutes from my favorite movie.
1. Chapter 1

**Kat Stratford**: Tell me something true.  
><span><strong>Patrick<strong>: Something true... I hate peas.  
><span><strong>Kat Stratford<strong>: No, something real, something no one else knows.  
><span><strong>Patrick<strong>: Okay, you're sweet, and sexy, and completely hot for me.

**Mr. Morgan**: All right, not that I give a damn, but how was everybody's weekend?  
><span><strong>Joey<strong>: Oh, I dunno, maybe we should ask Kat?  
><span><strong>Mr. Morgan<strong>: Unless she kicked the crap outta your dumb butt, I don't wanna hear about it!

**Kat Stratford**: [_drunk. Leans in close to Patrick_] Hey... your eyes have a little green in them.  
>[<em>Patrick smiles momentarily, then Kat vomits at his feet<em>]

[_Mr. Stratford makes Bianca wear a pregnancy belly before leaving for a party, Patrick arrives and sees her_]  
><span><strong>Patrick<strong>: [_to Kat_] Who knocked up your sister?

**Kat Stratford**: We're going now.  
><span><strong>Walter Stratford<strong>: Alright, wait a minute. No drinking, no drugs, no kissing, no tattoos, no piercings, *no* ritual animal slaughters of any kind. Oh, God, I'm giving them ideas.

**Walter Stratford**: My insurance does not cover PMS!  
><span><strong>Kat Stratford<strong>: Well then, tell them I had a seizure.


	2. Chapter 2

**Walter Stratford**: Hello, Katarina. Make anyone cry today?  
><span><strong>Kat Stratford<strong>: Sadly, no. But it's only 4:30.

**Michael**: Sweet love, renew thy force.  
>[<em>Start of Shakespeare's Sonnet LVI<em>]  
><span><strong>Patrick<strong>: Hey! Don't say shit like that to me. People can hear you.

**Walter Stratford**: I'm down, I've got the 411, and you are not going out and getting jiggy with some boy, I don't care how dope his ride is. My momma didn't raise no foo'!

**Chastity**: I know you can be overwhelmed, and you can be underwhelmed, but can you ever just be whelmed?  
><span><strong>Bianca<strong>: I think you can in Europe.

**Bianca**: There's a difference between like and love. Because, I like my Skechers, but I love my Prada backpack.  
><span><strong>Chastity<strong>: But I love my Skechers.  
><span><strong>Bianca<strong>: That's because you don't have a Prada backpack.

**Walter Stratford**: [_Bianca and Chastity are sneaking past Bianca's father_] Shoulda used the window!  
><span><strong>Bianca<strong>: Hi Daddy!  
><span><strong>Walter Stratford<strong>: Hi... where're we going?  
><span><strong>Bianca<strong>: Well, if you must know... a small study group of friends.  
><span><strong>Walter Stratford<strong>: Otherwise known as an orgy?  
><span><strong>Chastity<strong>: Mr. Stratford, it's just a party!  
><span><strong>Walter Stratford<strong>: And hell is just a sauna.

**Ms. Perky**: People perceive you as somewhat...  
><span><strong>Kat Stratford<strong>: Tempestuous?  
><span><strong>Ms. Perky<strong>: "Heinous bitch" is the term used most often.


	3. Chapter 3

**Walter Stratford**: This morning, I delivered a set of twins to a fifteen-year-old girl, do you know what she said to me?  
><span><strong>Bianca<strong>: "I'm a crack-whore who should have made my skeazy boyfriend wear a condom"?  
><span><strong>Walter Stratford<strong>: Close, but no. She said, "I should have listened to my father".  
><span><strong>Bianca<strong>: She did not.  
><span><strong>Walter Stratford<strong>: Well, that's what should would have said if she wasn't so doped up!

**Patrick**: Ooh, see that, there. Who needs affection when I have blind hatred?

**Patrick**: Leave it to you to use big words when you're smashed.

**Ms. Perky**: So, I hear you were terrorizing Mr. Morgan's class... again.  
><span><strong>Kat Stratford<strong>: Expressing my opinion is not a terrorist action.  
><span><strong>Ms. Perky<strong>: The way you expressed your opinion to Bobby Ridgeway? By the way, his testicle retrieval operation went quite well, in case you're interested.  
><span><strong>Kat Stratford<strong>: I still maintain that he kicked himself in the balls.

**Ms. Perky**: Nine schools in ten years. My, my. Army brat?  
><span><strong>Cameron<strong>: Yeah, my-my dad is, uh...  
><span><strong>Ms. Perky<strong>: That's enough. I'm sure you won't find Padua any different than your old schools. Same little asswipe shit-for-brains everywhere.  
><span><strong>Cameron<strong>: Excuse me? D-Did you just say... Am I in the right office?  
><span><strong>Ms. Perky<strong>: Not any more you're not. I've got deviants to see and a novel to finish. Now scoot. Scoot!

**Mr. Chapin**: You look pretty nervous.  
><strong>kid in detention<strong>: Yes, sir.  
><span><strong>Mr. Chapin<strong>: You're sweating like a pig.  
><strong>kid in detention<strong>: Yes, sir.  
><span><strong>Mr. Chapin<strong>: You're eyes are all... bloodshot.  
><strong>kid in detention<strong>: Yes, sir.  
><span><strong>Mr. Chapin<strong>: You've got pot, don't you?  
>[<em>the kid pulls out a bag<em>]  
><span><strong>Mr. Chapin<strong>: I'm confiscating this.  
>[<em>walks away and sees Cheetos on another students desk<em>]  
><span><strong>Mr. Chapin<strong>: This too.

**Joey**: [_to Patrick after Kat backs into his car when he won't move it out her way_] Watching that bitch violate my car doesn't count as a date.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chastity**: I know you can be overwhelmed, and you can be underwhelmed, but can you ever just be whelmed?  
><span><strong>Bianca<strong>: I think you can in Europe.

**Bianca**: You're asking me out? That's so cute! What's your name again?

**Patrick**: Someone still has her panties in a twist.  
><span><strong>Kat Stratford<strong>: Don't, for one minute, think that you had any effect whatsoever on my panties.  
><span><strong>Patrick<strong>: Then what did I have an effect on?  
><span><strong>Kat Stratford<strong>: Other than my upchuck reflex, nothing.

**Walter Stratford**: Where's your sister going?  
><span><strong>Kat Stratford<strong>: She's meeting some bikers. Big ones. Full of sperm.  
><span><strong>Walter Stratford<strong>: Funny.

[_after purposefully crashing into a car_]  
><span><strong>Kat Stratford<strong>: Whoops.

**Kat Stratford**: What is it, Asshole Day?

**Kat Stratford**: You're looking at this from entirely the wrong perspective. We're making a statement.  
><span><strong>Mandella<strong>: Oh goody, something new and different for us!

**Patrick**: Hey there girly. How you doin'?  
><span><strong>Kat Stratford<strong>: Sweating like a pig actually and yourself?  
><span><strong>Patrick<strong>: Now there's a way to get a guy's attention huh?  
><span><strong>Kat Stratford<strong>: My mission in life. But, obviously I struck your fancy so you see it worked. The world makes sense again.

**Kat Stratford**: You are amazingly self-assured, has anyone ever told you that?  
><span><strong>Patrick<strong>: I tell myself that every day, actually.


End file.
